The Muse

She walks in beauty with her Mona Lisa smile
Taming even the most wildest of wild
Their hearts fall victim to raging fires
That burn and burn till midnight hours
And I am one of those that show the symptoms
I am Picasso, I am George Byron
In matters of love I remain silent
For my work of her bares the roar of a lion.
If I described her, you would not believe
how her hair flows like poetry down her cheeks
Or how her lips are where the ocean and the shore meet
Or that her eyes, encompass still water than runs deep
Yes, Because of her many men have lost their sleep.

She is the proud evening star, admired from afar

Mid planets are her slaves, her beam on ripples and waves

Her reflection on the Rhone, is for what Van Gogh is best known

She has drove many to madness and plunged some into greatness

I am one of those inspired by her soul

I am Edgar Allen Poe and she is Helen

Decades of history weaved into her fabric

No place is big enough for her beauty not earth, nor heaven.

I do not speak merely of her looks; I speak of the prose within her book

Her compassion is unmatched by any mortal I have met

She is selfless and gives her all without regret

Her drive and her spirit can wake the dead

For she is life itself and the unknown that lies ahead.

If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die

              

             "When a writer falls in love with you, you become immortal.

              When a writer falls in love with you, you become the unwitting inspiration of a whole mess of spilled ink. You become all nine muses to a lone typewriter.  You become the lyrics to a melody, the syllables of iambic pentameter, the plotline of a fantastic adventure. One day you will be reading and you will find yourself trapped in the middle of pages. When a writer falls in love with you, you will find yourself in lives you never lived and characters you never knew.  The writer won't always intend for you to be there, but you will find yourself in the little things... a background character with a similar lisp, familiar flecks of green in the eyes of a hero, a stupid joke you once told now immortalized in ink.  The ring you always wear on the middle finger of your right hand will suddenly appear on a character who shares no physical attributes with you-- but you are there in the subtleties. You'll discover yourself in narrators and scapegoats and irrelevant side-characters: all characters who aren't you, but whose hair bears an incredible likeness to yours, or who love the same absurd Swedish rap band, or who cry at the same old Disney movie, or whose third tooth is chipped just like yours. Sometimes you will find yourself blushing at an obvious reveal-- a love interest that could not bear more likeness to yourself, or a poem that so directly describes your situation that you can't help but assume, or a character that sounds like you except a thousand times better than you ever thought of yourself. Other times, you won't even recognize the subtle characteristics that relate this character to the love the author feels for you.

            You see, when a writer falls in love with you, their words will reveal you in ways you had never imagined yourself. When a writer falls in love with you, you may sometimes find yourself at the end of a loaded pen; you may find yourself holding a piece of paper on which your writer has inscribed the universe in a few lines. You may find yourself with words that overwhelm you. If a writer truly falls for you, you may become the unknowing recipient of hidden love letters composed of stars and light. You may even be lucky enough to be the knowing recipient of a love letter in which you are painted in shades of sky. The writer won't intend to make you so visionary, but they won't really be able to help it, because suddenly the words they treasure so dearly cease to be enough. They'll write to you and about you, over and over-- on pages full of scribbles and crossed out lines, because in their minds, they will be repeatedly failing to do you justice.

           If a writer falls in love with you, they will begin to see you everywhere.  There will be obvious comparisons in the writer's mind between the two of you and the couples in every book read and movie watched.  But more than that, your writer will start to find you in day to day moments. You will be thought of as autumn leaves are gently lifted into the wind. You will be remembered in cool breezes on hot summer days and warm fires on cold winter evenings. To the writer that cares, your laugh will be present in the pitter-patter of spring rain on dry earth. You will be remembered likewise as the ribbon of the typewriter spins. The front of the mind, the tip of the pen-- that's where you will be. Even if your place in the life of a writer is ephemeral, if you are loved, you are eternal.  When a writer loves you, they cannot help but write about you as they discover you in the universe around them.

       When a writer loves you, you can never die, because long after you are gone, those words will remain, and in them, you-- immortalized in ink."

Repost from The Memories of a Gemini:

Shots fired

"Shots Fired." "Officer Down"
The Navy Yard is a killing ground.
High above the Atrium floor,
The first person shooter
wants to run up his score.
I enter the atrium and dive for the wall
as singing death pays my partner a call.
"Officer down, building 197"
He's a lucky one, his Kevlar vest saved him.
I crawl on my belly towards the stairs.
Will he add to his total ere I make it there?
I pass the corpse of a pretty girl,
with a puzzled look upon her face.
A red rose blooms from her white blouse.
Fear flees as anger takes its place.
The swat team enters and exchanges fire.
I make the stairwell and start creeping higher.
I remove my shoes and in stocking feet
I silently climb toward the deadly sounds
I stumble upon a security guard
Who nevermore will make his rounds.
What happened next, I'll always remember
about this deadly dark September.
A deep breath to calm me,
I chambered a round.
Was it my shot that brought
the mad murderer down?
There were many shots fired
That terrible day
As hunter, become hunted,
was brought to bay.

I checked on my partner.
I called my wife.
I am more than happy to get on with life.
The shooter is on the coroner's table.
I write up the incident as best as I'm able.
I left out the part about the girl
Who has gone, we hope, to a better world.
She gave me courage, she banished fear
She is probably the reason that I'm still here. 

By John F. McCullagh

This amazing amazing poem was shared with me by a former co worker of mine. When I first read it, I could relate to every word written and it reminded me of Zimbabwe. Because this is such an unusual poem, I wanted to share it with everyone.

Apart from bringing back alot of haunting memories, this poem brought a couple of songs to mind, that I used to listen to, to give my soul some peace. These songs are dark and morbid but at the same time they are about achieving internal peace.

Let me die in my footsteps (Bob Dylan cover)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p7RHvsDeQ_I

Trevor Willmott also did a cover of Radiohead's Videotape, which you guys should look up. Also look up radiohead's videotape song in reverse, it is agonizingly beautiful.

Pages of a book

"Do you think the universe fights for souls to be together?
Some things are too strange and strong to be coincidences."

-Emery Allen

I wonder if there will be a morning when you’ll wake up missing me. That some incident in your life would have finally taught you the value of my worth. And you will feel a surge of longing, when you remember how I was good to you.
When this day comes I hope you you will look for me. I hope you will look with the kind of conviction I’d always hope for, but never had from you. Because I want to be found. And I hope it will be you - who finds me."
-Lang Leav

"A gentle reminder that your heart is a
muscle and so should be exercised regularly,
love often and love deeply." 

-Beau Taplin

"The loneliest people are the kindest. The saddest people smile the brightest. The most damaged of people are the wisest. All because they do not wish to see anyone else suffer the way they do." 

-Unknown.

 

I got a book from a friend, a belated birthday gift to help inspire me to write again. These are some of the quotes that I found beautiful, that I wanted to share with you guys.

 

The Cycle

Oh I struggle to believe, baby

That I was in love with you

Well I was humbled by your beauty

They said you’re a lot to loose

Yes, every time you kissed me

I would get dazed and you'd be amused

You’d linger on my lips

Like raindrops on a roof

Every drop I’d succumb

I was weak to your wicked moves.

Oh I struggle to believe, baby

How I could have been with you

Well I was humbled by your spirit

And how you play by your own rules

You knew what you wanted

Wouldn’t settle for any less

You were perfectionism

Did everything to impress

Nobody could have you

because you’d play with the hearts

Of those you choose

They lost everything

And you had nothing to loose

But you ain’t having my heart

No, no you ain’t having mine

No more.

You better believe it, baby

I’m stronger from being with you

And now I play by my own rules

Those rules I learned from you

There used to be a time

When my heart was easily bruised

But you broke it so many times

That my mind told my heart it’s through

There was only pain in loving you

And now you ain’t having my heart

No, no you ain’t having me

No more.

Oh I struggle to believe, baby

That I was ever in love with you

You stuck me with a bitter taste of love

That will linger on to those that come after you.

I wrote this about a friend's heartbreak. The idea is that heartbreak is a cycle, when you get your heart broken sometimes you inadvertently end up breaking someone's heart, and that person has no idea what he/she has coming.  

P.s. - Just wanted to share this song, it's pretty good. Romantic and empowering, G-Eazy is sorta like the Beyonce of rap.

G-Eazy - Alone

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZz6OEK0icM 

My love is not divine

I walk in the rain
But I’m showered by your love
And when the wind blows
I can feel your fingers
Running through my hair
Even as the sun shines
I can feel you there
I can feel you there.

You’re driving me insane
Always on my mind
Pictures everywhere
But none of them in frames
I hear your voice
Calling out my name
I can feel you there
I can feel you there.

You’ve got me
And I want you
I want your body
Your soul
Your love
And your time
I want the rights to you
And for you to be mine
Don’t want to share you with anyone
My love is not divine, it’s not divine.

Divided

You can never find a complete world
It will always be divided by the land and the sky
You can never find a complete marriage
It will always be divided by two minds
Everyone you meet, is lost in themselves
You have a voice, but they speak a different language
And no one man can put an end to this fire
This is the kind of fire that does not bare any smoke
It’s not like there is any less love in our world
It’s just that where you believe you will find it 
That’s where it’s never to be found.

Guarded

What is inside my heart
Is only known to the walls that surround it
And the soldiers who guard its secrets
They’re footsteps are in sync with my heartbeat
And their march is what keeps me alive
People have come from all across the lands
Some have tried to break through these walls
Others have passed them by, in search of an easier passage
But none have travelled within 
And so what is inside my heart
Is only known to the walls that surround it
But that is what keeps them coming.

Couldn't have said it better...

“My sense of abandon has increased. I’ve let go of a lot. I’ve become easier, indifferent to things I was giving too much importance to, some people in my life mainly. I feel like I’ve cleaned a lot of my clutter and unfortunately most of them were people. One thing I can say with a lot of assurance and confidence and something I solidly believe in is - if you lose me in your life, it’s your loss because I’m all about the people I know, I’m all about the relationships I’ve been in. I have given and will always give the people I love the world on a silver platter. So all the people who have forced me to let go of them, I believe it’s their loss and that’s the only thing I will say with arrogance. I will never speak about my career or my personal space or my professional ethos but the one thing I can say with arrogance is that if you lose me you lost a huge amount of something concrete in your life. That being said, I can never lose respect for those who have impacted my life, because I’m not an easy man to befriend so my loyalty will always stand with friends new and those I have lost from a distance.” - George clooney

Chapter 8: Humanity

"I needed to escape so I traveled to Minori, the only place that was familiar to me. Minori was one of those towns where old world charm defied the future. It was divine and romantic with scattered shades of reality like one of Blake's paintings. It is a place you have to see to believe. I went there for silence and to find peace in my soul but I came back with something more.

As I walked the town's narrow cobblestone roads, I met a homeless man. His name was Carlo. Carlo was a free spirit. He traveled the world sleeping on sidewalks and documenting his journey, trying to find his place in this world. He started his journey at age 30 and now at 65 years old, he made it to Italy. He made his epic journey possible by playing for change and selling portraits of people. He also worked as dishwasher on weekends so he could get free food from restaurants. He had it all figured out. What intrigued me about him though, was his confidence and the fact that feared almost nothing. He had been to prison more times than he could remember, he made a home for himself on the sidewalk undeterred by passers by and he hadn't showered in 3 months.

Carlo's lifestyle was something I wasn't familiar with, so I asked him why he chose to do what he did and he explained to me that he had tasted success as a musician and as a restaurant owner, and though success was sweeter than he imagined it left him with a bitter aftertaste. You see, Carlo made himself successful so he could take care of his family but he lost his wife 5 years into their marriage. The loss of someone he cared deeply about set him into depression and that's why he gave it all up, because at that moment he lost the meaning to his life. Then I asked him why he slept on the sidewalk, why not just rent a room and he told me its because he believes his wife is watching over him, and when he sleeps under the stars he feels closer to her. Needless to say, I was speechless. After nearly 3 hours of sitting beside him, listening to his stories my faith in humanity was almost restored.

I was so enamoured by Carlo's stories, I couldn't let him sleep alone on the street. Being the stubborn man that I am, I forced him to join me for dinner. After dinner, I took Carlo back to the Villa where I was staying, and I made him a bed in the balcony so he could still have the view of the stars but more importantly so that he could shower!

After he showered we sat down to talk, I told him he was welcome to stay here anytime and that I wasn't doing him any favours or charity, to me this was the start of a beautiful friendship. A deep and a dark one, just the way I like it. This prompted Carlo to ask about me, the medals and some of accolades and pictures on the walls left him wondering who I was and what I was doing in Minori. He asked about my life and what I did and all I could give him was vague answers that didn't amount to anything, I couldn't give him the answers he wanted because I never existed then. I told  him I was a ghost and just as I expected the next day he left, without saying goodbye, without saying anything.

The first thing they teach you is that you can't have relationships, you can't get close to anyone and I have learnt this time and time again. When people give they expect in return, that is how trust is built. I was told I am hard to trust because I never open up. I've often wondered how true this is, and i will leave you with this thought. If I thought the same way as most people do, I would have ignored Carlo when I saw him on the street. People are extraordinary and sometimes you must take that leap of faith in order to unlock their story, even though it might seem impossible."

Side note: I know the ALS Ice bucket challenge is a big thing at the moment but before you donate do your research. Only a very small percentage of your donations go to research, most of the money is spent in marketing and other expenses. If you want to donate to a good cause, I suggest donating to the Being Human Foundation. Unlike most charities the Being Human Foundation doesn't ask for monetary donations, instead they encourage volunteering and other forms of social charity. I've supported this charity right from the start and I can vouch that it is legit.

Lover

Lover

I traveled to the afterlife                                                                                                    

You’d think that I would be more alive

But I keep thinking of you

Of all our troubles that seem to brew

Because one of us was misunderstood

You were never really mine

Just in my head and in my heart

You lit up my soul and fought the dark

Now when they dig me up

You’re all they will find

In every lyric, in every rhyme

Lover

I caught a glimpse into our past

Those times you smiled and when you laughed

And I can never forget

The day your heart broke in two

The day I started blaming you

Because one of us was misunderstood

You were never really mine

Just in my head and in my heart

You lit up my soul and fought the dark

Now when they dig me up

You’re all they will find

In every lyric, in every line

Lover

As far as the present stands

I still wish to be your man

No, I can’t just be your friend

Because I love you till the very end

Oh, I don’t know why that is

That I long to taste your lips

And have the last dance

Before silence takes my hand

And all the whispers begin

I know I misunderstood

You were never really mine

Just in my head and in my heart

You lit up my soul and fought the dark

Now when they dig me up

You’re all they will find

In every poem, in every rhyme

You are mine

You are mine

You were mine.